I Heart Hrvatska – Zagreb Edition

I bring you a belated part 2 chronicling how my specialmanfriend and I  got our wander on across Germany, Croatia, Bosnia and Austria. We say “auf wieder-something” to Berlin…  and “ne govorim hrvatski” (I don’t speak Croatian) to Zagreb, Croatia.

Zagreb is hot, leafy and kicks some Italian buttface in the icecream/gelati department.

Here I am in Zrinjevac Park, which we walk through to get to the centre of town. The park has a  fountain, a band pavillon and beds of flowers that look like kaleidoscope clouds. This park also boasts the highest number of kissing couples per capita of anywhere in the entire frickin world. In fact, pretty sure that fountain is running on their saliva alone. KISS ON, SEXYTOWN.


Ana and Dan took us to 22000 Milja, which is a bar masquarading as a submerged submarine complete with bubbles. You all know my penchant for bubbles.


The first known instance of doubleface was documented at this cute little fish restaurant up some secret stairs in Zagreb. Afterwards we took in this awesome view of the old town from the Lotrščak Tower, where an empty cannon fires at noon everyday. In time’s past, this alerted the bell-ringers of the city’s churches to get their chime on. Zagreb folklore also tells the story of the cannon being fired centuries ago, exactly at noon into a Turkish encampment of soldiers across the river. The cannon smacked a rooster right off its platter which was on route to feed the Turkish General. The Turks freaked, scattered and abandonned their plans to attack Zagreb. Pansies.


Here we are at Tolkien’s House – A Lord of the Rings themed pub. We drank delicious lemon beer and then moved on to the themed cocktail portion of the dusky evening – Dan ordered a “Bilbo’s first time” (A Bailey’s and Apricot liqueur shooter) and the very burly, beardy proprietor nearly coughed up a lung from laughter.


We move from bar to cafe to bar and this is actually how we see most of Zagreb.  It was on route to more caffeine that we meet this statue in Radiceva street at the Upper town entrance. This is the dragon slayer St. George (post slayage). Some hilarious person I wish was me had hung a string of near deflated balloons off his lance. When we see the statue , someone (possibly Ana, equally possible it was Mossy or Dan) says “I’ve killed the balloon monster!” and it was the best thing anyone had said, ever.


Here we are posing with the great big bronze ball (representing the sun) in Bogovićeva Street. It was made by the sculptor Ivan Kožarić in 1971.  In 2004 artist Davor Preis decided to secretly add in all the surrounding planets in a scale model of the solar system.  Preis never disclosed the locations of the planets, so discovering them turned into a game for people. Kind of like collecting Pokemon. GOTTA CATCH EM ALL – PLANETMON!


Great, now I have the Pokemon theme in my head. Thanks a lot, Croatia… Here’s a link to something that isn’t the Pokemon theme.

Next time: we visit heaven on earth, Plitvice Lakes National Park.